1.
Be funny. -if your not trying to crack a joke or say something sarcastic every once in a while, your not trying hard enough.
2.
Laugh at them. And not in a “your an idiot kind of way.” -Nothing makes a person feel more loved than when he/she cracks a joke and someone actually laughs.
3.
Share. I know as you watch your spouse drool onto your pillow in the night, part of you wants to go back to your childhood days of duct taping a line down the middle of your room and labeling every personal object with Crayola crayons and “DO NOT TOUCH signs. But we’re a little older now and you have to admit there is something warm and fuzzy that happens inside when you see your wife lounging in your huge oversized college sweatshirt or when you witness your husband using that PINK hammer from the girly tool set your mother in law gave you so you could be more independent. Just remember and try to live by what a wise kindergartener once said, “I always share my toys....until I want it back.”
4. They say people only read the first three and the last item on a list....so is this one even necessary? If your still with us....#4 is
Dress up. Dress ups are not for just for kids. :) Every once in a while its fun to dress up and go out OR dress up and stay in (wink wink). Just ditch the sweats every once in a while!
5. Traditional Role swap. There is nothing sexier than a man in an apron cooking up something scrumptious for dinner! Or a woman dangerously holding a nail gun in her hands attempting to construct a book shelf or planter box that the man will have to fix later.
6.
Hold Hands. And don’t use your kids as an excuse that you cant! You have 2 hands. Free up 5 fingers to hold onto someone you don’t want to lose. (I’m talking about your spouse!! We all know it builds character for every child to get lost at least once in their life. Those 3 year olds find their way back anyways.)
7.
TALK. A given? Not so fast. At least twice a year go on a road trip where you are forced and bound by 4 sides of metal into really communicating for a minimum of 3 hours. These are excellent times to just vent, daydream about what type of restaurant you would open up one day, or trap them uncomfortable conversations you’ve specifically saved up for times such as this so they couldn’t sneak off with a “work emergency” of Words with Friends. Often times it helps to set a certain mile marker up ahead for the two of you to come up with an appropriate solution to a problem (unless of course your disagreement is about the number of children you should have, then expect frequent bathroom breaks and “cautious,” SLOW driving to occur, or even complete detours to avoid said mile marker.
8.
Have kids. I know. I know. Some of you are thinking, THE KIDS are the source of our problems! But really, life gets monotonous and boring. Every couple eventually needs something new to talk about and kids are a breeding ground for conversation starters. There is no better way to strengthen your communication skills than the wake up at 3AM to a puking child and try to coherently “discuss” who gets to start cleaning up vomit and who gets to frantically search WebMD. And when you cant find that darn 3 inch thermometer anywhere in the “miscellaneous drawer,” nothing brings you closer than trusting in your spouses sound judgement that the “back of the hand to the forehead” method has indicated that the child indeed has a high fever and needs medical attention immediately. I promise, nothing will bring you closer than having a child.
9.
Go OUT. Whether its a hot date to buy diapers at Walmart, or a 35 step walk to get the mail. Just do it. Also refer to #4 and #6 while “out.”
10.
Have separate bathrooms. I’m not kidding. Lets be honest, between shoe and clothes hazards, towel thieves, cosmetic explosions, other kinds of explosions, tooth paste wars, cliche toilet seat arguments, razor mysteries...I believe many marriages would be saved and many comedian’s material would run dry, if married couples just had separate bathrooms! Just sayin. Once we all agree that this is not like having separate bank accounts and that it is okay to have one of you relocate (with all your toiletries) to the uninhabited downstairs bathroom and still have a functioning, nurturing, happy marriage we can all say with certainty, “We’re making it to 10 years of marriage, baby!”.
